Developing Selflessness in Sharing a Bedroom


                I share a bedroom with two of my sisters. One is fourteen and one is ten. Being the oldest in the room, it can be sometimes challenging and most of the time fun. ; ) Sometimes… Not so fun. We are all imperfect human beings and sisters, so we are bound to get on each other’s nerves every once in a while.  Responding the right way is the key to getting along with each other when sharing the same living space. This is by no means something I am great at. With the Lord’s help, we can overcome!

Sometimes clash of personalities is what causes the problem. Sometimes a wish for privacy or a lack of space. The most occurring problem in my room is none of the above. Our problem? Well…. There are some people (me) and others (my sisters) who have very different ideas of a clean room. I am the one who is constantly after them to pick up, hang up, put up, or organize. I am their sister so most of time they are NOT going to listen to me. ; ) You may be laughing, but this is the truth! I desire a clean and comfortable space for living, while a little mess doesn’t bother them in the least. They aren’t slobs. They just see a mess as something that can be tackled later (or never, whatever works out) and I want it clean NOW. ; )

This being said, my struggle is remembering to be kind when problems arise. My first reaction is to get frustrated.  I want them to stop leaving their things everywhere. I want them to put their shoes in the closet, instead of in the middle of the floor. I want them – The list can go on. But you know what? Even if the other person may be doing something wrong, it doesn’t give me the excuse to act wrong as well. I’m only responsible for how I act. Not my sisters or anyone else.

Remembering WWJD is a good way to self-discipline yourself in this area. What would Jesus do? Would Jesus get mad about an unclean room? Would He be frustrated with his family when they forgot to put their clothes away? Well…. I don’t think so.  Jesus was not selfish. He was not self-seeking. He was okay with discomfort. He loved others unconditionally, even those who mocked Him and beat Him and scorned Him. We should strive to do the same. If Jesus’s personal comfort was not important to Him, how much more should our own comfort be unimportant to us? It’s easy to think about yourself, whether you are satisfied or content or comfortable with the situation. But really trying to say, “Others comfort is more important than my own,” and meaning it, is what makes a mature and selfless person.

This is a post about my own point of view from sharing a room. You may be thinking, “Well, shouldn’t her sisters have a little respect and pick up after themselves?” That may be so ; ), but that isn’t the point of what I’m writing. Not what should they do differently, but what can I do differently? Because I’m not responsible for their actions, but for my own and I want to do the right thing.  They may decide to leave a mess, but if I walk in and inwardly fume, I’m not doing the right thing.

Sometimes developing a system can be helpful. Sharing tasks and chores so everyone pulls their share. I have found that Saturday morning is the best time to do a deep clean in our room. Which includes vacuuming, sweeping, and organizing. Picking up throughout the week so Saturday is not a major burden is also helpful. ; ) When I stray from this, I usually find a pretty big job ahead of me. Girls, you don’t know how many times I have been told that we are having company or an electrician or someone coming over and our room needs to be clean. I promptly set my alarm clock for 5 in the morning to start cleaning. My sisters? Yeah, there is no way I’m getting them out of bed. So I rise at 5 to start cleaning for whomever is coming over. ; )

Needless to say, this is far from fun! It would be so much easier if I would remember to keep my cleaning plan. But, that doesn’t always happen, unfortunately. ; )

I really do think that sharing a bedroom is character building! Living in close quarters with your family can be challenging, but if you come through with grace and faith, I’m pretty sure you can be a good roommate to anyone. ; ) None of us are perfect. But, with God, we can have patience, selflessness, and grace! Putting others before ourselves may not be the easiest way, but it is the best way. : )

Thanks so much for stopping by today! I’m thinking about slowing shifting to doing faith or family posts at least twice a month. Please don’t hold me to it, because my WiFi can be extremely unreliable and life happens. This will stay ultimately a modesty blog, though. : ) Blessings!


9 thoughts on “Developing Selflessness in Sharing a Bedroom

  1. Thank you for this reminder! I share a bedroom with my 4-year-old sister, and my 1-year-old sister will soon be moving in as well, so I find myself picking up after them a lot, and sometimes getting frustrated about it. But I am having lots of opportunities to practice grace and patience! 🙂


  2. Oh my goodness! NO WAY! I thought I was the only one! I seriously sat here with my mouth open and giggling because our stories are so identical! This post was really good Melanie! Thanks so much! I have the same problems with my two little sisters whom I share a room with. I have to decide to just be at peace with it, and clean up my part. I try to make light of my OCD need for a clean room, and with God’s grace, It doesn’t bother me as much any more. I’m not perfect and I still have those days or moments, but it is better than it was. You are so right about it being a great learning thing for us older sisters. And you know what? I wouldn’t trade sharing a room with them for anything. I have the option to get my own room when my older brothers move out, but I want to stay with the girls. It is so special and we have so many girl chats and special times together. So blessed that we are so close.
    Well, that was a long comment, but thanks again for the post and the encouragement!


    1. Hey, Victoria! Your comment made me smile. 😉 As older sisters, we can probably relate often! Thanks for stopping by, and I need to get over to your blog soon! Blessings!


  3. Well, I don’t share a room, so I can’t quite relate, but I can definitely see how it would be character building! I’ve always wanted to share a room, however. Not with my brother though, more of like with my non-existent sister. But you’re so blessed that you have sisters to share a room with!


  4. Our three sons were having a disagreement over who should clean what in their bedroom when I came across this post. Very timely! I called them into the living room and read them your wise words and a wonderful discussion ensued. Thank you so much for sharing! ~Mrs. Long @The Long Way to Go


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